It seems that at least every week I see another friend post on Facebook their post-graduate plans: job offers, fellowships, internships, abroad opportunities, and even some engagements. While we can all say, “congratulations!” and be genuinely excited for them, what do the rest of us do while we wait to find out what’s next after we cross that stage in May?
While it seems like everyone else is figuring out their lives, it’s important to remember that in order to get that desired “yes”, we often have to deal with many painful, discouraging and frustrating “no’s”.
Most seniors begin the job/post-grad search in a process that is very personal and private. Maybe they tell their family, close friends, or even a few professors. I had the unique opportunity of having one job opportunity publicized all over the internet through Facebook, articles on my University’s website, and even the cover story of our school’s magazine.
- To watch my video submission, click here.
- For an article about being in the top 6, click here.
- For an article about being a finalist, click here.
- To read the magazine article, click here. (*this is most accurate if you want to find out about my story and thoughts during the process)
I won’t go into the story here but to sum it up: I found out about this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity the day it was due, submitted an application and through a unique process of many rounds, I ended up as one of the three finalists for Golin’s Unternship program.
Not only did I realize how my one simple idea could turn into a potential reality for my life, but also was overwhelmed with the amount of publicity this idea was getting. Family and friends posted on Facebook. Friends texted me (even some who are currently abroad). Professors emailed me. Students would ask about or comment to me about #50stateswithcate or tell me that they had seen my video. It seemed that wherever I went, at least a few times every day, this was brought up. A normally private decision was now public for my whole social network to know.
I felt extremely overwhelmed and uneasy with the amount of attention my potential post-grad plans were getting. I didn’t know what was going to happen. What would happen if I didn’t get it?
Well, that is why I am writing this blog post.
This past Monday (March 2), The Edge magazine released the March issue with me as the cover story (see here: a sincere thank you to The Edge for capturing my story beautifully). If people didn’t already know about it, they sure do now. Within minutes, I received comments, texts, and Facebook posts about it; people I don’t even know have stared or smiled at me when walking around campus.
I want to make something clear: I am extremely appreciative of all the support, encouragement, prayers and affirmation I have received from my family, friends, professors, and Elon University. I had absolutely no idea that pressing “submit” on a random application would lead to all of this. I can’t even begin to describe the ways this has affirmed my career path, my choice in university, and the quality of friends and family I am blessed to have.
However, as I mentioned, most seniors do not have their potential post-grad opportunities posted all over the internet for the world to see, especially when they aren’t official. That’s why people only post the official announcements of jobs, internships, etc. Why would anyone post “didn’t get the job offer I interviewed for” or “officially rejected from ____” ?? Well, I’m here to do just that.
Announcement: I officially did NOT get offered the position of the Unternship.
I got the call yesterday (March 3 – the day after the magazine article was posted) and was extremely disappointed. Many of my close friends and family members knew I was going to hear back soon, and thus began the slow and painful process of telling others that I was not selected.
Why am I “announcing” this? We don’t talk or post about the challenges, the disappointments, the rough times, because we just want to have the world think of our accomplishments, successes and dreams.
Technically, I don’t have to tell anyone or make this announcement. This is “my” life and I shouldn’t feel obligated, right? Eh, I say no. This is just ONE story of a “no” — how many of us have similar stories like these? It wouldn’t be fair for me to have all of this publicity and not share how this became a closed door. To share an example of how things that appear like they might work out don’t always do. To share how life is sometimes filled with many more disappointments than we’d like to admit. To share the “no’s” because one day, I will announce my “yes”.
Social media offers a deceiving view of reality; not every life moment is filled with exciting status updates that receive hundreds of likes. What do you do when you don’t get the interview? The internship? The job? You realize that you’re just like everyone else before you. The guy who just got offered a job? He was told “no” from five companies before that. The girl who got into grad school? She worked throughout college without much affirmation and didn’t know whether she would be accepted.
Life is full of ups and downs, as we all know, but I think it’s incredibly important to let yourself deal with the reality of disappointments. It’s okay if you are upset, hurt or angry (for example, I cried in the middle of campus when I ran into friends yesterday and I also sat in my bed and cried with others who came over). There is a lot of value in letting yourself deal with those emotions. I’m not saying you have to publicize it, but I am saying to know and remember that you are NOT alone — that everyone at some point in their life faces rejection.
After allowing yourself to accept and deal with the disappointment, you are then able to move forward with a deeper appreciation and excitement for what’s next.
So what’s next for me? Great question.
The door with Golin as the “Untern” may have closed, but there is potential to work for them as an intern for the summer. In addition, I have the ability to continue networking in Nashville, hear about a status of a fellowship I applied for, and look into other post-grad opportunities.
For now, I plan on letting these opportunities pan out. I am content knowing and trusting that God has other plans for me, and I am excited to see what exactly those are. Although I do hope I will have a little less publicity as I figure out what’s next, I will be sure to announce what is my “yes” – even if I have to face many more no’s to get there.
“The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.” (Psalm 32:8)
The Beauty In Our Brokenness 